So I come home yesterday and walk towards my bedroom. I keep picking up what I think is leaves all over the floor. I'm yelling to Jimmy, "Why are there leaves all over our house?". I guess he didn't hear me. And then I come upon the core of a rose bud. And I run to my tea cup where I keep my memory flowers. One from my grandmother's funeral and one from the roses that Jimmy sent me when we first started dating. And they are gone. The fucking cat tore them to shreds. Completely unrepairable and absolute garbage. I actually cried for a second. I was so disappointed. Irreplaceable. I could not even look at the cat for the rest of the day. I was so upset. I even moved them to a very high spot in my bedroom so that he would not be tempted to play with them. I know he isn't really to blame. But I am so angry at him anyway. ::sigh::
On another note. I went to my nuerologist yesterday. I do not have the antibody. So I can do the every four week IV at the hospital rather than the daily injections. That is a good thing. That was his first choice for me and I think after doing the injections for my medicated cycles that I am relieved I don't have to do that daily for the rest of my life. He also said that all my tests except for my thryoid (which I already knew about) came back with no immunity issues. That is a huge plus as I guess when you have one immunity issue (and I have two now) it is super common to start having more and more break down. I do have to contact my RE and check if I can take B12 supplements while I am TTC as I was very low on that. I was also low on Vitamin D, but he is rechecking that when I have my thryoid checked again for my pre-IVF test. He did say that my face plant into the sidewalk on Monday night was probably one of my first "symptoms" of my disease. Not a fan...but what can you do? I guess a face plant one a year isn't too bad compared to what I could have happening. So now we wait to see if my IVF is successful and either after pregnancy or after the IVF if unsuccessful we begin the IV meds. I'm terrified...but I've had to face alot of things that I've been pretty scared of in these last few months. They say what doesn't kill you just makes you stronger. Then why do I always feel so weak? I should feel indestructable!!
Friday, January 7, 2011
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I am so sorry about your shredded memory roses :(
ReplyDeleteWhat an answered prayer that you only have to do the IV every 4 weeks instead of daily! I am praying like crazy this IVF cycle is a success for you love!