Monitoring

So I got up at the crack of dawn. My RE's office is an hour and a half away and for some reason they want me to be there at like 8 every.single.time. So I have to leave my house by 6:30 at the latest. It sucks. But what can you do? So Jimmy couldn't get off work today and so my Mom and sister went with me (which today meant leaving at 6 to get to my Mom's house in time to leave). It was a nice, easy drive up there. I get my bloodwork done and then go in for my ultrasound. The Tech got my hopes up as she said I had two rock stars and a little guy. So I though 2 maybe three. Fast forward to my phone call from the nurse. I have a 16...a 12 and a 9. So if the 12 doesn't catch up to the 16...we will have only one again. I am so terrified they are going to recommend cancelling again. For a few reasons. Jimmy and I are both hitting our limit on this whole IF thing. And we have already hit a large, hard brick wall when it comes to money to buy more meds or anything else. We just found out we owe on our taxes ($713) since we took money out of our 401k for the IF to begin with. So I don't know what will happen if they recommend that. Do we go ahead and do the IVF with one follicle and pray like crazy that it rocks it? Do we cancel and do another IUI and pray like crazy that it works and never do an IVF? I don't even know how I feel about it all, but I will have to make a decision very soon. I am so sad and frustrated and sick about it all. Makes me wish I was a drinker or a smoker or something I could do to "escape". But alas...

So I have to continue with my Bravelle tonight and tomorrow morning. Add goneralex to tonights regime and then be at the RE's first thing tomorrow morning for more blood work and another ultrasound. This is my punishment for telling my Mom and sister that I have never had to go for more than one monitoring appointment since I O so early in my cycle. ::sigh:: When will I learn to keep my big fat mouth shut? Most likely, never. So I am now praying like mad that at least the 12 catches up. In a perfect world the 9 would get in the mix as well. Is that too much to ask for? Maybe, but I'm going to anyway. You hear that? Three follicles large enough to be involved in the ER...pretty please?!! With whip cream and I'll even give my cherry...tee hee...I just realized how that sounds. Okay...more tomorrow!!