Terrified but relieved...

I met with my nuerosurgeon on Friday and was informed that not only do I need surgery, but I need it immediately. So tomorrow I go under the knife. I have never been cut in surgery before. I had laser in my teens and that was scary enough. This time they are slicing my neck open (that should be a lovely scar :) and going in and removing my damaged vertabrae and putting a metal plate and artificial vertabrae in it's place. I am going to be down for at least a week and might not be able to go back to work for up to 2 weeks. I am terrified on so many levels. And I am vain enough to admit a big part of it is them scarring my throat. The doc said that he will try and put it in one of the natural folds in my neck. And everyone keeps telling me it's not being done in an emergency situation so they can take thier time and do it right. I'm afraid about having a metal plate in my neck. Am I going to set off the detectors wherever I go? I asked my sister that and she laughed at me, I thought it was a legitimate question. I still do :) And it's going to be a lot on Jimmy taking care of me and James. Trying to keep things "normal" for the little guy. Up in the morning, breakfast and t.v. and then off to school. My Mom is helping out picking James up and dropping him and dinner off in the evenings so the boys don't starve while I'm down. I always said I would love a week off in bed, I just didn't anticipate the throat cutting, body part removal in my day dreams. Oh well. The pain will be gone...yippee...but not necessarily the numbness. Doc doesn't think that is related, but he said right now all he can focus on is the more pressing issue of my vertabrae, then we can see what is up with the numbness if it is not a side effect of this issue. Oh yippee. Might go through all this and still have some of the problem. Doc said he realized that the numbness is the more annoying and troublesome for me. But the pain and the vertabrae pushing on my nerve for this long already is all he can worry about. He has no idea why they did the injections on me. Said that the nerve is not being pressed by swelling, which is what they would improve, but by the vertabrea, and only removing it will fix that. So here I am. Putting it in God's hands and looking for the bright spot...as soon as I'm healed, I can start TTC again. So look out DH...it's going to get crazy!!