Devastated...

So last night Mom, Michielle and I go to Pop's for dinner like we do every other Tuesday night. I'm in pain and Mom threw her back out and is hardly moving. Michielle has just returned from a week away and is trying to get back in the swing of things. So it was a mellow night. Nice and quiet. As we are wrapping up our game of Golf (I was winning!!) my Dad strolls in. This is unheard of in Tuesday Night Dinners. He sits down and says that he would like to talk to us when we are finished. I say that on that note I believe we are finished. He then tells us that he has been diagnosed with Prostrate cancer. Stage 2 of a very aggressive strand. That it has not matastisized as yet, but that he is at a Level 8, which is too high for several procedures.

I alternate by the minute between saying that I have to remain positive for him to I need my Daddy and he hasn't even met my kids yet! I am trying to remain strong, but just feel so in shock. Was my Mom fighting for years and finally beating Non-Hodgkins Lymphnoma not enough? Was burying Mimi just 2 years ago after her battle with Pancreatic cancer not enough? Was my scare as a girl of 16 who at 37 now still doesn't know if it will have any adverse effects on child bearing not enough? Has my family not been hit between the eyes too many times already? How much more do we have to take?

I will say that we did have two chuckles before we got in our cars to drive, in my case balling, home. First after everything Dad says and tells us, Pop says, "So you have a chance!". We all busted out laughing and Pop got very upset. But it's become the family montra now, "so I have a chance!!". And then as we are pulling away he says to me "No more tears" and "No more crying" to my sister, who tells him "Now go find a bear and tell him he can't shit in the woods, and let me know how that goes for you!". I'm sure she wasnt' trying to be funny...but it made Dad and I laugh...which is taken in any form right now.