Ugh

Woke up to an excrusiating calf charlie horse (I've had ones in my arch as well :). I forgot how painful they are. Horrible way to start the day.

Massage

So, for my birthday, Jimmy and James gave me a massage gift certificate. So I had called and scheduled an appointment then had to change it because I was sick. Then I had to call and cancel it because I was STILL sick. So finally I got to go this past weekend. Ladies...if you have never had the joy of a massage...treat yourself!! I have been getting massages for years. I got Jimmy going with me for couples massages since shortly after we started dating. He wasn't sure he would like it and now he reminds me that it's been X amount of time since our last :) So I thoroughly enjoyed Saturday. I got an excellent massuesse (spelling?). She had just the right touch. I was loving it. I would like to get another one done when I am further along. But we'll have to see how that goes. Heavenly I tell you. So...do what you have to to make it happen for yourself Loves. You deserve it...

Sick!!

So I went to Chicago for my Godson (and his twin's) baptism my birthday weekend. I was set to stay with my little brother and his family. When I got there I was informed that his wife and son had been sick, but were "over it". Lies. All lies. The baby was sick the entire time and my SIL ended up at Emergency Care on Sunday. So...I got sick. And of course with being pregnant my immune system is weak and mine turned into broncitis, acute broncial spasms, sinisitious and a viral infection. Fun stuff. I have been sick for 9 days now and I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel yet. I tell Jimmy I am dying at least once a day...it has become a joke around our house at this point. I saw the doctor and was put on antibiotics (weak ones) and an inhaler. But they do not seem to be helping me. I am so frustrated. I have coughing fits (that sometimes end in my vomitting) that then make it nearly impossible to breathe. And I had to come back to work even though I am not nearly ready. It bites. Today after a pretty nasty coughing fit and alot of wheezing and trouble breathing, Jimmy told me that we can go up to Illinois and smack my brother and his family. I just might take him up on that!! I even had to cancel my prenatal massage that I had scheduled for tomorrow (my birthday present from the boys :) because I didn't think I could enjoy it and didn't want to get anyone else sick.

And while I was at my sick appointment, my doctor had me do bloodwork to check on my Vitamin B12 and D deficiancy statuses (I have been taking supplements for awhile now). And while I was dying on the couch yesterday after work, they called to inform me that I had not absorbed a smidge of the B12 (the horrible, caulk like pill that I have to gag down...bastard!) and I have to switch (with my OB's permission) to a weekly B12 shot (in the ass thank you very much). So I finally finish with my fertility shots, and now I get this. And once I'm not pregnant anymore...I will add shots for my MS as well. I am destined to be a pin cushion I guess. I just need to accept it. It's crap I tell you!!

2nd Trimester

Holy crap...how did that happen already? My chance of miscarriage goes down to 5%...that is my favorite part. If the morning sickness would subside...it would be perfect :)

Exhausted...

So...I was born with bad hips. They have always been a weak joint for me. When I started IF treatment I was a good 20 lbs. overweight. Then add IF meds and another 25 lbs. Way too much for my frame. Now that I'm pregnant, I have to sleep on my side, i.e. on my hips. They hurt all the time. Last night I kept moving from one position to another trying to take the pressure off my hip. I have a pillow between my legs and one I body hug. I finally got up and slept on the couch where I could sleept with my head elevated and my feet elevated at the same time so I wouldn't get pain in my stomach. But it meant I more napped throughout the night. Not to mention all the sleep I lost trying to fall asleep initially. It sucks. I am not even 3 months along and I am already struggling with this. How am I going to survive the rest of this pregnancy? I have two flatter pillows from my couch that I am going to snag tonight and see if I can place one or both under my hip and see if that takes some of the pressure off. I already sleep on a foam mattress atop our normal mattress. I am starting to panic a little...okay...alot!!

First OB Appointment

So I had my first OB appointment yesterday. Got to hear Hercules' heartbeat. It is the BEST sound ever. Unfortunately the doctor only let me hear it for a milisecond. Not nice Dr. Wolk. So as a result I HAD to order a doppler to hear it all the time. I think Jimmy will get a kick out of it as well and I can not wait for it to arrive!! Like it needs to be in my mailbox when I get home, can't wait. Hurry up!! So I asked doc about coloring my hair. And he said to me, "with all that you have been through to get here...is it really that important to take any chances...you don't look that bad". So I guess I will not be coloring my hair till after I give birth. That should be a lovely mess as it already looks like shit. My poor godson who will forever have pictures of a fat, old, gray haired godmother in his baptism pictures next weekend. Oh well. I guess he is right in his cautionary attitude. Jimmy and I opted out of the down testing. We would never do anything to end the pregnancy anyway, so why take a chance with false positive and worrying and such. I had a downs aunt. My concern with this is the medical issues that come with it. Sadly she passed very young from a hole in her heart. I could care less about the mental issues. I would not love my child any less...I just hate the thought of them not living a long and healthy life. But we are not doing that. Bad part of that is no u/s in a week now. Boo. But what can you do. So my next u/s will be at 18 weeks for an indepth look to see if there are any deformaties or issues that can/need to be addressed while I'm still pregnant. But it's also when we will get to find out the sex. So 7 more weeks till that. I go back in a month for another check up. But doc said that all was as it should be. My cervix was good. The heartbeat was perfect (I could not agree more!!) and everything was right on track for where it should be. So all in all...a very successful visit. Whew. Now...where the hell is my doppler...shouldn't it be here by now? Come on already!!

On a side note...I just had a thought pop in my head. The whole issue of IVF meaning that my child is any less viable then a natural conception child really bothers me. I have a friend who's children can not be baptised in her Catholic church because they are IVF babies. But if you believe as I do that God has his hand in all...then if he really didn't believe that I should have this amazing miracle that is snuggled in right now, then wouldn't he have just made my IVF not work? I mean the odds were all against me. Two eggs, one fertilized and matured. Not very good chances...and yet...miracle of miracles...I got pregnant and have successfully carried this pregnancy further than any that I conceieved naturally!! I'm sorry, but I trully believe that God wants me to have this baby as much as I do. That he put me in the hands of amazing doctors who helped to make this happen. But then...that's just me.

10 weeks

So I made it to double digits. Woot woot :) I also am sharing my first belly pic. I look huge already. I don't think that is normal!!

How far along? 10 weeks 1 day

Weight gain/loss: Unfortunately I had gained almost 25 lbs. from the fertility meds. But I have not gained anything from the pregnancy as yet.

Maternity clothes? I wear a mix of regular and maternity pants and tops

Sleep: I have been waking up alot to pee. Last night I used a pillow between my legs/knees and actually almost made it through the night for the first time since I'm pregnant. I hope it's not just a fluke :) Update: It was a fluke, back to peeing all night last night.

Best moment this week? any moment I'm not sick

Food cravings: I have not had any cravings. I've had things I no longer like as a result of trying to eat them when I feel sick.

What I'm missing: SUSHI...big time!! Jimmy promises me he will bring me rolls in the hospital...although I have to find out if they are okay while I'm nursing.

Gender? I don't know yet...not till August...Jimmy really wants a girl, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed for him. My Mom keeps saying it's a girl from different "signs", but we'll see. I just want healthy...I'm more excited to see what she/he looks like.

Belly button...in or out? In still

What I'm looking forward to: My first OB appointment next Thursday...and I pray an u/s.

::sigh::

I think that Jimmy and I have fought more in the 2 1/2 months of this pregnancy then we have in the 2 1/2 year prior. Not sure we're going to survive the whole pregnancy. Wouldn't that be ironic?